i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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