I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
