Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
