That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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