I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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