Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize