Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
