That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
