instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
