I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
