You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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