Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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