OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I could fuck to npr.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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