so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
