you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
