Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
