im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
