the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
