so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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