The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
