so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize