If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
