Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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