I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
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