Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
