It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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