I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
