so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize