I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
