So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
