the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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