He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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