so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
third nipple confirmed
I am available for nakedness
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
