so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize