finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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