Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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