I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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