just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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