check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize