Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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