So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
