everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
