My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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