is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
