Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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