with your own penis?
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Randomize
