once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
