Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
i barfeds in our rink
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Randomize
