Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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