If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
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