you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
lets start a swedish sibling band together
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize