I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
